Ka Hoku o Hawaii, Volume XXXIV, Number 37, 10 January 1940 — Untitled [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

Accordins to the Star Bulletin, Jaiwinese second generation ls going very modern iu <*elebrating Chnstmas and New Years. Now lfsomebody would onlv oonvince second generation Chinese that shooting off firecraekers for a whole week is au obsolete uietliod of driving the devil away, we niight manage to enjoy our own lioliday a lot better. Shooting tirecrackers off on a holiday is bad for the nerve«, especially lf the nerves happen to belong to an old veteran of wor!d war No. 1. Too many fireerackers For little Ohin Oheek; Do<xor says he'll be home Iu about one more week. 1940 fable: Onee upon a .'time there was a Haole who refused a« inv{tation to a New Year's luau. Twelve thousand Chrjstmas post cards went through the Hilo j>ost office, according to report. Thi.< does not include the ot\es de!lvered persomilly by Scotchmen. SOURPUSS SAM SAYS:

"I was going to pay my $5 poll tax until I read in the paper where

Mr, Hoover is rai#ing money to heip the FJnns. The poll tax ean wait but the Finns can*t. A fin for the Finns is a a°°d slooan for everybody to adopt. The tax eollector ean wait," CbristJuas bonor<>; \Vhat abont the Hilo maii wlio receiyed 12 quart bottles of hootch und slx oases of beer on Christmas, who nerer drank a drop in his life? And the feilow who always drtnks got a jjresent of a bible and a bag of dried fish? DESERT POME No. 55 Asteep on the desert ts poor little Jonah; He stayed mueh too long At that last plaee ln Kona. And there*s the Hilo blg shot wbo liad sūch a good time in Ho uokaa that he drove hls car atl th« way back to Hilo in seeond gear without knowing it. We got over Chri#tma« And New Years, too; But vM#'re anxiou#ly wo«d*rtns What happened to YOU, BULL-ET»N

"I stayed at home al! <lay New Year's Day." REViSED VĒRSiON lt wu th« «ifht befor« Chri*t- «** Ail wa« quiet īn the hou«, Until the kW* «aw Santa Claus— H« forgot to button hi» blouse. The next ou the program wIH be a song by ihe vountv emplo?e§> uiale quartette, entitle<l "Sweet Adelice." County employef h»vt r»o ©ffieial combination ©f eolei-*, but we happen te know th«y *re p*r ti«i to B!ack m4 White You «»«> inteipret this any way you iike lo some plaees thw ls no pSa(f ilke hot«e—<vn New Yesr'.« t>ay. may»e sh« has scotch ancestry

Ott!e ftr»«mHf»«t te m|»ny •Hfc «H€kinet f«r Chrt§tn «« t»**t

she wears a new pair every day, . and doesn't hesitate to advertise , th« fact. Here she ie , them off, (or shalt we say on). And she's the only one in the office that isn't broke after the holidays, whieh proves that she's not so dumb after aii. AN EASY TARGET That fellow who tried to siioot a iiole through Germau Air iliuisier Ooehrlng must liave beeu a rotteu niarksman. Anybodj" wlio . couldxi't !iit that big elephant at a lmlf mile shouldn't play arouud \vith a rifle at all. . " _ Some of those county departments that never have enough money to see ihem through the year ought to find out how Bandmaster Wela manages to have a surpius eaeh year. H»s depart. r«M?rit shows that it had a surpius of $2.17 at the elose of 1939, whieh is more than enough tp buy another copy 0 f the "Seer Barrel Polka." MODERN VERSION Mary had a little lamb, With green peas, spuds and gr»vy; That was Mary's New Year's dinner— She ate it witli the navy. NEWS !TEM

Personnel of the U.S. navy thips are enjoyma the sc« ner y of the Big Uland- And what scenery! We feel so sorr.v for 17. S. sailore who bought umbreUas before they arrived in HUo. WINTER HITS REDS HARD— Newnpaper h«adttne. And what the Finn» are hitting them w!th i»nt Just *newba H«. Wanda WafPseiron got a Christnias paekage frtnu the Malnhm<l tbe <lay after New Years, bearing tlie inscription "Do JSot Upen Cntll Dec. 25," so she's keeping it iutact uiuii uext Oliristuia&, if she ean oontrot her woman's purlosity until then.

THR!FTY, AS USUAL

Sandy McPherson is working on an invention that wili save the country milUon* of dolar», He i* perfecti«fi

«n artlf?cia! ChH«tma» tr«t that c*n b« u«ed year «fter year. ?OOKS AtWAYS WEĪ.Oi FOK MAS-Or HOrSF—Kew.»pnper headllne. I*i\»vidin& of <xntrse. they*re not the ktftd a man sometlmes gets when hp arrlves home frotn a stafr party to the early- hours of the momlnp. 1940 »loo«n: A« comptete?y bu«t«4 «« « New Ytar re»©tutlon, Att Wa«da Wafneirvn hiui loft la«T TwN»d«y womlnjr was ftve «!.♦ Vīes rttwe* «nd no »en«e t.i.i.A And thtr«*» th* buiine«4 man who I» «tHI datl«g M« )ett«m IW.