Ka Hoku o Hawaii, Volume XXXVI, Number 2, 7 May 1941 — Untitled [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

This eoiumn i$ open for contrilution<i. 1} ynu have a good | gag, send it in anil ue uill publish it, anei givc your name thc , creilit.—Koko-JS'uts. j

((.'ouvtes>y I-lilo Tribuno Herald) The Big Islati<ī is safe from invaaion, now that our own troops arp back. And speaking of so!diers, here's a pretty good story about one. j Looie: "There's a lot more to motorized infantry than juct riding in' a truck. Now what are your duties! when the trucl< stops?" ' Rookie: "I get out and push!" j ■. ■ ■■ i ANOTHER ONE ) The lazy draftee, hands in poe-! kets, shuffled up to the hrand new shavet.ail and reported: "Lootenant, guesa what happenpd? I eame to drill without mv ritle." 'Why you poor idiot," screamed the indignant looie, "what would you think of a soldier who went into battle AVlthout his gun and amnumition?" "Well, sir," was tho quiot veply, 'Td tliink he was an officer." According to report, German sub-! marines are so thick in the North Sea there !sn't room for the fish. GUĒSS SHE'S RIGHT

Liule Streajnlines, the o£fice stooge, savs she thinlcs the reason fat a!f!i ;ire so good natured !s that they can't run and they can't fight, so they just liave t.o ?augh their way through the \vorld, Maybe the horse !auflh is ne myth atter aH, Hors*s are lriteUfgervt and we ean'l bla,me them for laughing when they see how human beings act toward «aeh other. Eookie (011 guard for flrst time): friend! Wlio goes t.here?" w — HVHjIN OF HATE A guy we hate ls Dickie Bender; You park your car, He sits on the fender. Lengetidary: Onoe upon a time the averiige t»erson conld enjoy readlnc the front page of a nevrspaper, But that was before the days of bhtzkreigs. SOURPUSS SAM SAYS: M No maiter how many good *things a wian in a smail town does, nobody takes any notice ot lt, It's en!y when he does something wronj that he gets al! the attenti{.n,** woros w6*vē le:arned to HATE Bl!t.Ekrelg. Neutr*JJty, Proi>aßanda, Ot>mmuniQue, AppeasemeWt. R?aekotit BRIT!SH DĒNY LOSS OF SHIP —frlew*pape>- headline The print »M ©ught to !eave that head stan<! i«8. Whai i om,t t y ls n 2Ro ,:o īlial e.u» hoiieh: fer a diniie. DESERT POME NO. IV2 ....A«)«ep on the d«sert, B*nt«th the br!ght moon, I» * (ont pseture «aieiiman WHe was bor« .mue* toe «eon f tv the tlaRtV tras ftjj*niPhfd h> Jm» ni!lī his Now# Th«t'* abo«i of *•«> vo'o: *v.V, kwaono tt ori£tr*ī<rH l S !ho M Htti*r a !ct cT inva»'c»

plans but it seems Churchill has changed most of them. BULL-ETIN

'<My friend, Saridy McPherhon, insists on paying forthis dlnner." .. HYMN 0F HATE A girl we liale Is Flossie Pickett; Sho talks and talks Till you buy a ticket. Sandy McPherson says St's really grand the \vay the English are backing up (ho Scotchmen iu this war. SE2 WAIAKEA WILLIE:

"Maybe a cocktail tastes better to some folks when served ir\ a new' plaee with a fancy nam«, but there ' is no differerice ln the effect." | The ehampion līar of tīiis preserit ' day nnd ago is 01d Warren Oo?.e. I LIMMER-LICK There was a young man of Kau Who stepped at Chcng's plaee tc eat stew , ' Where the stew was so gecd ■ He ate a<l he eou!d— ! And his last ha!f dol)ar he blew. | A WaokoM for Mani" Wo ! ■f«n.v submit tliaf M:nii does hov| own blaokout — ew»ry nigiit at Si o'eloek, —Maul j And tho night v.-atchnia>! ;it \V;ūKīlv« has difficuHy in g t >tting to' pleep after that hour bt»c;ni?e thotofrn is so Quiet. |, i 1941 siml!e: As impressive as the 65-year-ofd whoopee boy at a Saturday ntgM party. J Foolish Questiou No. 333333; "l>o{ you think the folks will miud ii' \ve|: Wtke ihe kids »ilh us o\cr Uu 1 ■ weekei.ā? !

I i Waiuu Waffieirot\ ( the beite , WgnAkeA, I\AS a cousin who tc a IJC\ , oft(C< ccnc«Uon »n Hoii>v*ood. Sne teil« liekeU In a movte hous<. 1 And then?'s thf draft#e who sai s lu' isa't woriitHj about £etlāig lils job back wben he finishēs wi?h ihe arnjy, but he's woaāin lii® il he'll bo aWe kts girl t»ck, ANOTHEft SCOTCM JOKt (C«ntHbut«€ Wainaku Readct} Donaid; awti\ ss>e«rm, d'j ? « €«n*eed«c ihe ncvs ta„i\ti |i*t «novtgti ftre nUe tuc eennen?" Angu»: i dinn*, but ><jn*4 ne' his Cht«f 49Uct, *wifi Ihinkin' v ly>.c«id b« ma«r 4*ti«faeto<i d he pit m«tu o' h»s eemion int»l tl»e fire." WHO CARESr To llii' «oild a oiea i* i Arcly nu*«wi \Vlt«a hi? «id« i'as u«tuc Xo s.h« cuck<. i k*v. Wh« the w©m#n *to£ *fe«wt «»ch oth«t tc A>ixv*t th* wat, kn<j<* itt rc*'.ii ting ctrtou^ No* lliai the u eun. wout bc m\x\h Uio« tl« fi\vn( * ,v, s.. t HAT'$ ALL FOH .