Ka Wai Ola - Office of Hawaiian Affairs, Volume 13, Number 4, 1 April 1996 — A Hawaiian fairy tale [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

A Hawaiian fairy tale

by Billie Beamer, T rustee-at -Large Onee upon a time on the isolated island of iiawah a native group contrived to take over

the mle of their principality. On this island in demi-paradise every name was backwards. Their leader was an old judge of part native blood who created the royal order of kings to eall for another overthrow. There were no queens in his fiefdom who sat in the kitchens eating bread and honey. Only the young aspirant kings dreamed of sitting in the parlor counting out their monies.

It was a score ago when old king eole, without a merry old soul, strategized how to takeover iiawah. They would pattem themselves after the power holders who never let anyone forget they had gone to war. His new sacred cult would use the sacrifices of their ancestors, since none had made any sacrifices themselves. Rub-a-dub-dub these men in the tub knew that the fastest way to power was in the arena of politics. They ran for office and those elected employed the rest into the system. It was their aim to control half the lands of iiawah and all the king's gold. They bawled, wept and cried buckets of tears. And cajoIed the inhabitants of iiawah to cry until the island was flooded with brackish tears. They painted themselves with ashes and threw Sack cloth over their designer suits. The guilt of the populaee flared. This little principality compassionately wanted to make amends. They voted AHO a house of gold, long overdue. From then on they had a guaranteed ineome, a perpetual tarobread house. A little king was crowned, his men rode their mercedes horses to the steps of the palaee, where 01d king Cole gave them awa. Their one loaf of bread would multiply a million times. Key disciples were anointed. AHO's ineome filled

the native banks. The king and his money counters moved to control the 200,000 acres of land originally meant for the displaced. The speaker of the leaking state govemment house and the presi-

dent of the senate were named Urustees of the gilded House of Bishop. The king's wizard counsel was the last named to partake at the sumptuous table. No unleavened bread or bitter herbs for these native dudes. But, the Judge and the young King made one mistake. The caretakers of the monies at AHO were elected officers. And they were unable to control the minority, some even dared to answer back. Desperate to gain absolute control, another eoup to field

their own slate of candidates was organized. Twenty years earlier the king's guard called ula ekil received $200 million to up lift their victimized people. But, the victims only became victims of their own kind. Their resources depleted their chiefs planned to abandon the derelict promise along the side of the road and join the piinee of darkness who ruled AHO called eeh. The tribunal of chiefs formed a group called iun ialak ania to help eeh. The king of the iiawah with scepter and ennine robe lead a parade of his hand picked slate, there was ettir trustee for the island of iakolom; then yrrep, the chairman of ula ekil to replace trustee elaek; anoilopa, the pres. of ula ekil, to replace tmstee iilamak and their fellow enahuak for akaka. The people gasped, the king and prince eeh's court were all naked, yet they thought they were clothed until a young keiki of iiawah said aloud, "Puna, why are they are all naked?" His Puna replied, "shh my keiki let them think they are fooling us, Pooah deahs." Looking down, the king and his men fled into the hills holding their fig leaves. So ended another plot to take over the island of iiawah. And the people laughed and laughed until they cried, not because they were victims, but because they were mueh smarter than the old King, the little king and prince eeh would credit them.