Hawaii Holomua, Volume II, Number 12, 15 January 1894 — PHORCED PHORAGING [ARTICLE]

PHORCED PHORAGING

Successful Raids by General Scissors. A copy of the first dictionary, i made by Chinese schoUrs sn the year 1109 B. C., is still preserved among the *rchi vee of the Ceiestuls. \V*lter Bcsant is right in describing the Amerioan pe>iple aa * nat.on of slammers. We slam doors everywhere, and we s!ara our puhiie men as do no other people oo earth. Those who are concerned in meu’s {ishious will be intercsted M know that the Germau Emperor wears two bracelets. One 5s a watch bracelet, the other & gold ehain bracelet. B-)th are woru on the left arm. “California Midwiuter Iuternalion&l £xpoeitiou’’ is the oftioial aud full title of it. Semi-ofliciaIly it is known ae the Midwinter Fair. With the [wpulaee “the fair" is g-*od enough and !ong euough. Polo was taken from the Mani* puris. aud was first played by £uropeans iu 1S03 at Calcutta, whither it had been brought by some oflicers stationed in Aaaam. The game ean, however, be traceii back 6<X) years befjrethe Christ:an era. Prof. St. George Mivaart's work “Happiaeea in Hell,” whieh appeared originally in the mneleenlh century, and whieh provoked a Iengthy controversy and a deluge of eommeui, has beeu placed by the Vatican in Ihe Index £xpurgatoriua. Dick (translated iulo French) — “Say, Tom. whai is the Freuch for war-horse?” Tom—“Why er-er-horse de combat, I thiuk.” She—“How was your speeoh at the club received the other night?” He —“When I sal down they said it was the best thing I ever did.” Creditor —‘The consciences of thcse two bankrupts appear to be very elastic.” Assignee—“Well, don’t you expect elasticity iu suspeuders.” First Iitlie girl—“Has your sister begun takiu’ music leaaona yet?” Second little girl—“She’s takin’ somefiu’ on th’ piano, but I can’t tell yet whether it’s music or typewritin’.” He —remeraber that you have promised solemnly to be a sister to me.” She—“Yes; but you must not act as if you thonght you were the on!y relative of tbat kind I have in the wor!d.” Miss Laker—“Isn’t it too bad there are so many failures in life?” Wiswell—“Can’t say that il is. Tve been assiguee in tbree aud they paid me so weli I wouidit't mind tackiing more.” Jasi»er —’‘Bighead is a strange man for a philoeopher.” Jumpuppe—‘Tndeed!” Jasper—“Yes. He said tbat all men are rn-.*re!y animala, and yet got aogry when 1 called him an ass.” He—“Suppose, darliug. I was one of those busbands who alwavs comes down iate in tbe morning aud ihen grumblea because the coffe« is col(L’’ She—“Well, dear, I shou!d make it bot for yuu. ” “It is conducive to heahh to keep the mouih cloeed, is it not, doctor? ’ w Geoerally speaking. yes. In fact when oae gets out io Arii )aa. it is tbe oo!y sure way to avoiJ sudden de^th-” “I sav. Davie,” said oae bnv to • m anolher in a 5cjttisb town, “our meeoister wus veeeitin’ us L»9t niehL” “Fat! was he really?” was tbe reply. “Our meeaister disoa eome an’ see os unlii we’re died.” sas SJ«ILSP AGiU. “The boscutU tay mother made, were not !ike thes*—” Tbe young wtfe burst into tdanH—‘‘For tbese are aa hght as toe froth of ihe aeaa, Aad the beet I have Usted for fears.”