Ka Hoku o Hawaii, Volume XXXIV, Number 25, 18 October 1939 — Untitled [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

The (ienuiuis are using lou<i si>eabers I,JI tllo Western Front. Maybe thv.v eoulU win the war if ilu»y playeil swing bamt retrords. Tliat wimlil 1»-' moro ttn\n tho AUies i (>viUl sitatid. Ffnland is assemb!ing her navy, to fight RusSia if necessary. The only navy left that hasn't mobi- . lized is the Swiss navy. SOURPUSS SAM SAYS:

'■The way some of tliose eluniu'l phiyt'i's in swin? p!iiy one wouid

lliiiik thi'v xv«-ri' pī!tyiti- xv)t»o«T uny J»y Ilw ihey mnke." DESERT POME NO. 45 Asieep cm the desert |s tired WilHe Krupee; At a party last night He made too mueh whoopee. The war bas crf;it<?cl u (leuiaml i,. r cooomit oil, aeeonli»? to roport. We inijrln add tlv.H an un-l*i-ecetlentecl anwiin ot" b;uiaiia oil is ;,lso in demand m the meanttmo. THE SCOTCHMAN*S ALIB! "l've seen better days, sir," said a tramp to a Hamakua Scotchman, who replled: •»So have I—but 1 havena* time to discuss the w»ather the noo," a nd shut the door quicWy. 1939 As silly as the patent medioin<? ads broadcast orer the radio. SH£'S 60? THE HABJT, ANYHOW

Before %h# bought hers«lf s midget ear, Str«amHn#s used to wa!l< a mile every day vwork, That must be how «he acqujred a taste for Came!s. ll«9 (;tbU i : Oik-o upoti a t!iue theiv \vas a volunuiis( \vlio stopped writing wisecrarks and ail the scribers caucelie<l Uit'lr subscr!pU<MK Maybe Finland was fooiish to pay her vs»r debts after aīl, lf she is just going to be another Czech©Blovakia or a Poland. NEW JOKES FROM CURRENT MAGA2INES "Give me a sandwlch an<3 a drink. M 'Whitv bread or rjeT' "Wlūie bread AND rye!" She: "Mirter, you wduldn*t 8«t fresh wlth me Hke thU if <ny mother were here." He: w Ga<i» is she that florgeousr Muy: things eame to a head when .lai'k got lioiuo drutJk at f<mr ray: thr»H> vases, a set of Ui,shes and all the and j>ans." The wafles of s!n are twe cents m wonl. TeH a wouian an<t she'll fniwn. T»*U her she's atu! she % !l soratrh jnnir eves cmt. Satty: *l like your n«w b©y fri««d. He t«em« w «a«y a»lna w ftetty: "Ye*. but he isn*t ea*y •WM.STJN

*t WMnK tf jīhg ic

evade the poll tax." Kitty : "I divorred Jerry and be--lit»ve nie. he deserves it." (Mtty: "Yes, T think he's a urand fel!ow myse!f." LIMMER-LICK A <!ccr<»pit o!d 11:1* nian nained Peter.. While huiUinu: }ir«»und for the meter, Toui'lw»d a lo:ik with !ii>! light, l!e arose out of A(«l. as aiu'ono <<aii «<•<> hy \ his, ir tlestroyed the Dancing instructors have to f learn to take it on the shin, say& I Waff!eiron. ! Another noeded invention for ex- ! travag;ini peopie an nttachment ! t<> ]nit 011 their fingors so iuoney j < :ui'r slii> througli. | Have you heard the one about | the ancient Hilo flentleman who j has three pa»rs of a!asses —one 1 pajr for outdoors, one pair for J readin 8 and the third to !ook for j the other two? And here's_ one about the Kona iScotthnian wlio weiu 10 a dentist aiul jusL be£ore he was given tlie j;ass lie took out his wallet. '•There's 110 need," siiid the deniist. "to pay in adYance.** "Don't worry," s«nid Siuu\y, "l'm just v*ounling iuy iuouey liefore I heeome uneonseious." Kaka-Nuts asked th« lady who runs the dress making shop door how business was and she said, "Oh, just sew and sew!" Little Stre;inilines went intO liardware siore the other day and said she wonted to see some eheap pkates. The olerlī po!nted to the h/oss and the head bookkeeper. P!ease pass the che«se.